Today is World AIDS Day. I feel torn about these official "days of recognition" that come from the powers that be. Are these days to put something positive in the world, to focus on what I can do more or better in my own life and my work to reduce the amount of human suffering that occurs in the world around HIV/AIDS? Or is it okay to be pissed off at the idea that there's one day we should really think hard about things so the other days we can feel okay about forgetting? I understand it's a trade off, and I'm also torn because I know lots of people who put a great deal of thoughtful effort, throughout the year, into making World AIDS Day something that does have an positive impact. Being critical of it, particularly as someone who hasn't ever been very involved with organizing around the day itself, can feel disrespectful to say the least. It can also seem dismissive of folks who find comfort, motivation, or inspiration from the day and their personal experience of it.
Since blogs are a place where we're supposed to be true to ourselves (that's what they're for, right?) I thought I'd do just a little bitching and also suggest something more positive.
The problems for me come not from the idea, or from grassroots, community-based organizing around World AIDS Day. They come from more institutional quarters. For example, the UNAIDS site is currently highlighting some of the successes over the past year and calling for a goal of zero new HIV infections, zero discrimination, and zero AIDS-related deaths. It's a nice thought, but there's a problem with the math. You can't get to zero when you don't count everyone in. It's great news that the number of new infections and deaths are down 20%. But of course they aren't down for everyone. For some, HIV infection is on the rise. Depending on where you live, how you get around, what you look like, what you do for a living, and a number of other things NOT related to who you have sex with or what kind of sex you have, you're more or less likely to be infected. And while death is 100% certainty for all of us, the speed and comfort to pain ratio of dying when you're HIV positive depends on similar factors (class, ethnicity, access to citizenship, to name a few). What upsets me about the idea of "zero" is that I don't trust it ever includes all of us. Some of us already go uncounted. Where do we figure into the calculations?
Other than worrying and complaining, what else can I, or you, do on World AIDS Day to be a bit more proactive or engaged? I was inspired in this by another World AIDS DAY website , which is foregrounding the idea of fighting prejudice. In fact they're encouraging us to start with HIV prejudice by doing something today that develops your own awareness and encourages others to be aware of the many ways that the lives of people living with and/or stigmatized by HIV/AIDS are made worse by the prejudice they confront every day. Unfortunately, clicking through on their site to the part where they offer suggestions on what you can do is less inspiring (it's mostly about raising money or buying things). So here are a few things I'm going to do today:
I'm going to start by asking myself this question: When do I think about HIV/AIDS? What are the things that make me think of it? Is it TV, movies, news stories? Do I think of HIV when I see someone who looks a certain way, or when I'm in a certain area of the city or kind of place? What do these things that make me think of HIV/AIDS tell me about the way I think about HIV/AIDS?
Next, I'm going to have a conversation about HIV/AIDS with someone I haven't ever talked to about it. Thinking of this now I can think of a few people; the people who own the coffee shop down the street, my aunt, some of my friends I'm not that close to. But I won't plan it too much, I'll just point out that today is World AIDS Day and ask them what they think.
I want to spend time thinking about the HIV prejudice I hold, but sometimes that can seem too broad. So I will try to focus on something particular. Like maybe the way that when I, and probably a lot of us, think about HIV/AIDS, we only think about some people. We never really think about everyone who is affected by it. When I do this, when I let myself think about HIV/AIDS as a cleanly circumscribed illness, without questioning what I'm thinking and what I'm being told, I'm setting up a way of thinking and a set of beliefs that allows prejudice to thrive. Today I want to try and do it differently. So I'll ask myself a question that encourages me to think not just about people I know and what I know, but about others. A question like: Is there a way you can live your life and do your work such that you consider not only those you know who suffer, but all who suffer?
That's what I'm going to do today.
Find out more about World AIDS Day:
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I tend pretty strongly toward a position of disgust regarding these “days of recognition.” They remind me of the incessant drives, in my country anyway (USA) to provide canned food, toiletries, toys, etc. to poor people at Christmas time. I used to have a vague feeling that was a nice gesture. Now I feel it’s creepy, patronizing, and insulting, and indeed, as you hint in your article, a way to keep from thinking about poverty the rest of the year.
As for what causes me to think of AIDS, and how often I think of AIDS — it’s every day, many times a day, owing to remembering friends, and others, who have died from this disease which probably could have been conquered by now had the world not more pressing needs for money: readiness for nuclear annihilation, support of giant exploitative corporations, salaries of corrupt government legislators, judges, and “spiritual” leaders, etc.
I guess it’s lucky I’m 70 years of age and not just starting out in life. I might get angry.