This series of lessons is designed for people in relationships who are having sex but want to change or develop their sex lives in some new way. Each lesson includes a little bit of sex education, suggestions of activities to try out during the week, and an opportunity to let you reflect on your experience of what it’s like to try and change your sex life. This course is not meant as a substitute for working through things with your partner, nor is it a substitute for sex therapy or counseling.
I recommend starting the course from the beginning, or signing up to receive these lessons automatically each week as a 9 Weeks to Better Sex online course.
This week we continue the lesson from last week, exploring sexual alternatives to intercourse. As always, remember that variety for variety’s sake isn’t going to deliver great sex. It’s fun to try new things, but exploration should come from a desire to learn about each other, not for a need to keep up with the Joneses.
Section 1 - Erotic Education
Sexual Fantasy Role Play
When people say that the brain is our biggest sex organ they must be referring to our ability to fantasize. No sex toy or porn film could ever compare to our sexual imagination, and playing out some of our sexual fantasies is another opportunity to explore sexual desire and intention together.
Bend Over Boyfriend
More straight couples are exploring male anal play. Originally referred to as Bend Over Boyfriend (so named after an educational video on the subject) and also called "pegging", this kind of sex play turns the tables and can incorporate anal play, fantasy, gender and power play all at once.
Tantric Sex
In some relationships better sex doesn't mean more, faster, or harder...it means deeper (and not in the literal sense). Tantric sex is just one of many spiritual sexual practices that reframes sexual interactions between partners and for some provides a powerful way to dig deeper into your sexual potential.
Section 2 - Getting Your Hands Dirty
How to Do Sexual Fantasy Role Play
We've all seen couples role play in movies (usually to comic effect). But with so many considerations (roles, costumes, props, motivation) where do you start? Start here.
Put On a One-Person Show
If you're looking for a way to change up your sex life and teach your partner a thing or two about what you like, consider putting on your own one-person show.
Tips for Pegging
If you're in a straight relationship with a man and he's open to trying new things, exploring male anal play is like opening a new chapter in your sexual story, one you didn't even know what in the book. Here are tips on where to start.
How to Tips for Mutual Masturbation
You might be surprised to hear how many people in relationships continue to masturbate but don't tell their partner (and when asked, don't think their partner is masturbating). Masturbating is probably one of those things you'll always want to do alone. But for a change of pace, why not try to bring a little solo sex into your bed with your partner. You never know what you'll learn.
In a Sexual Rut?
One of the great barriers to better sex is how easy we can all get into a sexual rut. This exercise which asks you to mess around with your sexual routine is specifically designed to get you and your partner out of that rut.
