Creating a better sex life requires not only sexual action but sexual reflection. Use the ideas and questions below to guide you in reflecting on lesson one of the online course 9 Weeks to Better Sex.
This exercise asks you to reflect privately on questions about what better sex means to you. As you think about the questions below, don’t worry about whether or not you’re going to share this with your partner. If you can each complete the exercise and then share your answers that would be great, but it’s not necessary for the exercise to be valuable.
There are no right or wrong answers to these questions. They are meant to start you thinking only, not to evaluate your thoughts or feelings.
Questions:
- How would you define better sex? Would you say that better sex is something like what you’ve had before, or is it something you’ve yet to experience with your partner.
- Name three (or more) things that you love about your sexual relationship. As you think about this consider your entire sexual relationship with your partner from day one. It might be specific sexual activities, how you feel when you have sex, what your sexual relationship means to you, anything that’s positive and about your sexual relationship.
- Why do you want better sex? You may think that’s a funny question (after all, who wouldn’t?) but we all have different reasons for wanting what we want, and knowing your motivation may be helpful as you move through the next eight weeks.
- Where did your ideas of what better sex is come from? Past sexual experiences? Things you’ve seen or read? An inner feeling that you can’t quite place? It can be helpful when talking with a partner about your feelings and desires to offer them some context of when and how you came to feel the way you do about better sex.
