Creating a better sex life requires not only sexual action but sexual reflection. Use the ideas and questions below to guide you in reflecting on lesson three of the online course 9 Weeks to Better Sex.
This exercise asks you to reflect privately on how you and your partner communicate about sex. As you think about the questions below, don’t worry about whether or not you’re going to share this with your partner. If you can each complete the exercise and then share your answers that would be great, but it’s not necessary for the exercise to be valuable.
There are no right or wrong answers to these questions. They are meant to start you thinking only, not to evaluate your thoughts or feelings.
Questions:
- Based on the article about ground rules, make a list of your own ground rules for good sexual communication. What do you need to feel safe talking about sex with your partner?
- What was your experience of the talk about sex everyday exercise? What did you end up talking about? Were you surprised by the effect of not having sex for one week? What was that like?
- What was the outcome of the Broken Telephone exercise? Was it difficult to communicate in this new way? Did you notice any ways that one or both of you weren’t listening to the other?
- If you talked with your partner about trying something new, or about a problem you were having, did the conversation go the way you imagined? If so, how, and if not, how was it different. Thinking back on it now, are there things you would do differently that you think would change the outcome of the conversation?
