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Voyeur Self Masturbation

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We tend to think of voyeurism as being the act of watching someone else. And for many it is. But the foundation of voyeurism is about watching or more broadly attending to something, and the ways that watching or attending is itself arousing.

This is something you can explore on your own, through masturbation. Take a moment and think back to the last few times you masturbated. What were you paying attention to? If you are sighted, what were you looking at? If your masturbation includes erotic fiction, adult films, magazines or comics, when you're nearest to the point of release or orgasm, where are you looking, what are you paying attention to?

Next time you masturbate try to have a mirror nearby. If you’re not comfortable looking at your whole body, just have a mirror you can see your face in. Look at yourself in the mirror while you're masturbating. You don’t have to stare yourself down, but consider it a way of checking in, and discovering masturbation from a new angle. The effects can vary:

  • You may get extra turned on just by seeing yourself all hot and bothered.
  • You may find that seeing yourself helps you tune inward, becoming aware of thoughts and feelings that are floating through your mind and body as you self-pleasure.
  • You may notice things about the way your body moves when you masturbate, that you can play with or accentuate which can change the way masturbation feels.
  • You may feel silly at first, and find yourself criticizing your body.

If your reactions fall into that last category, don’t force the mirror exercise. But this technique can be a great way to work on negative body image too. It means you need to go slowly and make a serious effort to stop being self-critical and start telling yourself positive things about yourself.

You can also make use of all the inexpensive video recording equipment most of us have in our homes (on our computers, smart phones, and digital cameras). You want to be very careful not to leave anything recorded that might get out of your hands (erasing is easy). But you could film yourself masturbating. After you might want to watch it. Even if you don't, knowing you are on camera, being "seen", can change up the way it feels and you may discover new fantasies or feelings you didn't know were there.

If watching yourself visually isn't going to work for you, instead try to masturbate while imagining your whole body, as if you were someone else in the room watching. This may take you out of your body a bit, and so it might not work for everyone, but it's an interesting exercise in changing your masturbation perspective, and you can use your imagination to add some heat to what's actually happening in the room (add a costume, add a background, or add some extra characters).

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