From Cory Silverberg,
Your Guide to Sexuality.
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A.

Choosing a sex therapist can be difficult. Many studies on what makes therapy effective suggest that the most important element is the relationship between a therapist and a client. Certainly it is important that you feel like you and your sex therapist are working together, that you are basically on the same page in terms of what your concerns are, and how you are going to go about resolving them.

Here are some things to consider when choosing a sex therapist:

Who would you feel most comfortable talking about sexual concerns with?

Talking about sexual difficulties can be tough, so think about whom you would be comfortable working with. You might prefer a therapist of the same gender, or a therapist of a different gender than you. Things like religious background, ethnicity, sexual orientation, even age, might matter to you. Try not to prejudge too much, as you might find that a therapist with a completely different background as you is in fact a wonderful fit. There are no right or wrong ways to figure this out, but it is worthwhile to think about it for yourself before you start looking.

What are the issues you are bringing to sex therapy?

Some therapists will have specific areas of expertise. Here are some examples of specific issues that you might want to ask a potential therapist about:

• sexual dysfunctions
• working with people who have experience sexual abuse
• working with individuals or couples who identify as kinky, polyamorous, queer, etc…

Even if you don’t have a clear idea of what you want to get out of sex therapy when you are looking for a therapist, it can be useful to ask a potential therapist about their experience with specific issues or groups of people, just to hear how they answer the question.

Financial considerations of sex therapy

This is an issue for most of us, and if you do have any type of insurance, you might be able to find a sex therapist with the appropriate degrees that will allow the therapy to be covered (e.g. a sex therapist who is a medical doctor may be able to provided services covered by insurance). It is perfectly acceptable to ask a potential therapist about their rates, whether or not they have a sliding scale (meaning their rates are based in part on your ability to pay) , and how many sessions they usually have with a client.

More About Sex Therapy

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