Often journalists fail to "do" sexuality well when the cover it because they aren't willing to ask basic questions. Like most of us they are uncomfortable enough talking about sex that they're willing to take for granted that we all know what sex is, who has it, why we have it, what it means to be a man or woman and be sexual, etc...
It's one of the simple and refreshing things about Natasha Singer's short piece in the Times today about the new drugs to treat premature ejaculationthat are being pushed through the testing pipelines, each hoping to make it to the FDA approval finish line first (mental note: being fast is good in business, bad in bed).
It was probably Singer's experience covering both the beauty and health care pharma industry that gave her the knowledge and confidence to set aside the how-does-it-work and how-many-people-will-it-cure questions and start by asking; is there an actual illness in need of treatment here? Here's how she breaks it down:
"...creating a blockbuster quality-of-life drug like Viagra involves more than just being innovative or being first. Sometimes it requires a drug maker to create and market a whole new category of disease.
"The template goes something like this: Start with a legitimate quality-of-life issue -- like fitful sleep or shyness -- that does not yet have its own prescription medication and is debilitating to a few people a lot of the time. Next, position the quality-of-life issue as a medical condition with symptoms so common it covers vast numbers of people who had previously not identified themselves as having a health problem, or who thought they were just experiencing an occasional and normal annoyance."
We're used to most journalists completely suspending their critical faculties when covering sexuality. If Singer maintains an interest in bio-medical sex research we'll all be better informed for it.
The bottom line of the piece is that we should all get ready for a lot of carefully managed public discussions about premature ejaculation. Apparently I was six months early in singing the praises of premature ejaculation.
Read More - Sure, It's Treatable. But Is It a Disorder?
Related - Myths About Premature Ejaculation ; What Causes Premature Ejaculation? ; How to Stop Premature Ejaculation
This weekend you have a chance to do some good and support one of the most unique, least funded, and generally coolest sex education resource for young people online: Scarleteen. Since 1998, Scarleteen has been offering free inclusive, comprehensive and positive sex education, information and support to millions of youth. They've done this for eleven years on an almost entirely volunteer basis. No other site has managed to do so much and stay alive for so long.
What they talk about:
From body image to pleasure, from sex and drugs to sexual assault, from orientation to identity, Scarleteen offers information on so much, and they do it in multiple formats including message boards, blog posts, long form essays, and Q & A's. Recently they launched a text service where youth can text questions and get a real live person texting back. There are only a few organizations in the country that are offering this service, and frankly none that take the unique Scarleteen approach.
Why Scarleteen is important:
There are plenty of other online resources for youth around sexuality, so why do we need Scarleteen? In a nutshell, what they do and how they do it is smarter and better. Their approach is complicated, passionate, riled up, empathetic, never condescending, never pitying. They speak directly to youth who are most marginalized, the ones who don't see themselves represented in sex education content produced by larger national organizations.
I was lucky enough to survive being a teenager, but to be honest I just barely made it out alive, and I remember many people who didn't. Scarleteen is the kind of space where you can ask questions and get answers from people who may know a bit more than you do, but will never talk as if they know better.
The belief that they don't know better, but can still help, is what sets Scarleteen apart and makes them so successful at what they do. Lots of us (whether because we're young or queer or disabled or poor or imprisoned or, I could go on) have the experience of being surrounded by people with power over us telling us that they know better. That if we only follow their rules and do as they say, we'll be fine.
When we have questions a lot of the time we just need someone to listen, to respond without freaking out, to offer some context and some information, and then help us get there on our own. We don't need a perfectly packaged 3 step plan to sexual health, we need to figure it out on our own.
Scarleteen has managed to do this for eleven years for millions of youth. You can help them continue to do this work, and if you help them now you can make double the difference.
How you can help:
From Friday December 11th to Sunday December 13th, I'm taking part in a matching donation campaign. For every dollar donated during this weekend a few other donors and I will match your donation (up to $2500). So give now and you double the impact of your generosity.
I hope you'll consider checking out their site and learning more about what they do. I hope that if you have any youth in your life, you'll send them the link. And finally I hope that whatever you can donate, you will.
Help Lift Sex Ed to a Higher Plane: Support Scarleteen!
If you're thinking to yourself that it's too early to be publishing a holiday gift guide consider the fact that there are exactly 18 shopping days left until Christmas, 5 until Hanukkah, 20 days until Kwanzaa, and your two months late for Diwali this year. Plus, it's much better to get your sex toy holiday shopping out of the way first, so you have at least one thing to dream about as you take abuse from fellow shoppers and disgruntled salespeople. Between now and the end of the month I'll be featuring some of my favorite gift picks for all budgets, but let's start with the high end stuff.
About.com's Luxury Sex Toy Gift Guide
Image courtesy of LELO
