In theory, homemade sex toys should be the best of all possible sex toys. Given that most store-bought sex toys are designed and manufactured by people who never use them, and don’t really care about your sex life in the first place, how much better would you be at designing exactly what you want? While the answer usually is "not much better" it can still be a fun act of love (self or other) to make your own sex toys.
I would argue that what’s best about homemade sex toys is the creative process involved in developing them. Figuring out what sort of food item or hardware store-find is going to feel good where, is an exercise worth its weight in banana peels and silicone scrub brushes.
Below you’ll find some basic homemade sex toy tips, along with a variety of websites and books dedicated to the art of the homemade sex toy. If you take inspiration from others, you can also read my interview with the ingenious folks at Homemade-Sex-Toys.com .
Turn your favorite vegetable into your favorite vegetable with this basic homemade sex toy. Cucumbers are great for this as they can be easily peeled down to the perfect size. Some recommend briefly boiling the vegetable to soften it up.
Variations: You can also experiment with textures and temperatures. Unpeel a soft banana and put it inside a condom, use a microwave to warm it up, or the fridge to cool it down.
Safety: Only use toys like this for vaginal penetration. I would say that the hazards of unsafe anal penetration should outweigh your curiosity about whether or not that carrot could ever actually get stuck up there. And always use a condom over anything you put inside you.
Putting Your Thing into Other Things
Long before the eponymous scene in American Pie, guys have used fruit, fabric, pillows, balloons, and all manner of pastry as their own homemade sex toys. My favorite recent TV reference comes from the uncle on the Showtime TV show "Weeds" who recommended masturbation using empty banana peels to his nephew.
Variations: With homemade masturbation toys, the world is your oyster (although I’d avoid oysters, shells have sharp edges). Pick your favorite soft fruit, and carve away. You can also use a small plastic bag or a condom slipped through a roll of toilet paper and fill them up with any semi-hard or gooey substance for a homemade “masturbator”.
Safety: Avoid highly acidic fruits as it could irritate the urethral opening at the tip of the penis. Also, avoid things that could abrade the skin. A ripe avocado is fine, but a pineapple maybe not so much. If you’re using cardboard tubes for structure, make sure you’ve left extra room for growth. This is not a place you want to get a paper cut!
Stuck On You
Strap on's, also known as dildo harnesses or strap on harnesses, can be awfully expensive. And while they may be one of the categories of sex toys that attract the most thoughtful manufacturers (making the high prices often worth it) if you're inventive and looking for a way to explore harness play without investing big bucks, you can make your own. The simplest way to do this is stick a dildo in tight fitting "boy" underwear (the kind with the open folds at the front). You can also use soft rope, long scarves, or tight fitting, but stretchy fabric. All you need is a pair of scissors, and maybe some padding sewn around the opening to prevent tearing.
Variations: Strap on harnesses are a way of using a dildo without having to hold it. Typically they are worn around the crotch area, but there's no need to follow convention. You can strap it on to your thigh or hand or forearm or forehead. Or you can strap it on to another object (a chair, a bed, a tree).
Safety: The primary safety concern is circulation, and this is mostly a worry if you're using rope. Otherwise there aren't many ways you can hurt yourself with a homemade strap on. Be aware that the looser the fit, the less control you have, so intense thrusting is not recommended, as a toy that slips out at the wrong moment could be painful.
Hardware Homemade Sex Toys
Take a trip to your local hardware store and play this game; you and your partner each try to find five things that you could make into homemade sex toys. Next, go home and each of you is responsible for taking the contents of the other persons shopping basket and turning them into tools of pleasure.
Variations: You’ll quickly discover that almost everything in a hardware store has the potential for sexual use. You can go hi-tech and use a remote control doorbell to turn on and off a simple battery vibrator, or keep it simple and pick up a few feather dusters for torture tickling.
Safety: Common sense should guide you just as it does with any home reno project. Avoid anything that can cut or scrape the skin, think about allergic reactions you might have, and any sort of restraint toy needs to be easily removable.
Homemade Sex Toy LinksHomemade-Sex-Toys.com The first stop for any homemade sex toy enthusiast, this site specializes in homemade sex toy projects that are low pressure, low tech, and lots of fun. Illustrations and photos accompany step-by-step instructions.
Bondage on a Buck
A DIY web video series with more than a dozen projects, each explained in step-by-step detail on video. I can't attest to the safety of every project, but you can judge for yourself and when it comes to homemade butt plugs and floggers, having the visuals is handy!
The best place to find and share information about teledildonics and any kind of sex toy/computer mash up you can imagine. Run by self-described “mad scientist” (read: robotics engineer) qDot, Slashdong is also a very welcoming and supportive site for people of any sexual stripe who want to push the boundaries of sex and technology.
Oh Joy Sex Toys
This cartoon sex column from Erica Moen is published in Bitch Magazine. The link above is to a guest column from Isabella Rotman where she offers guidance on how to make your own harness.
From Frisky.com, not so much sex toys you make at home, but sex toys around the house, 8 Sex Toys You Didn't Realize You Already Have
This site offers five projects, three of which are for creating remote control vibrators.
Condom Dildos from MyVag.net
Check out the brightly colored dildos from one of my favorite women’s sexual health information sites.