What sex positions are safe during pregnancy? It's a common question. It's also a lot more loaded than most people who ask it realize. In fact the question exposes two problems with the way we think about pregnancy and sex.
Our first mistake is to think about pregnancy as a medical condition, and to think about pregnant women as extremely fragile. While there may be health issues and complications with the pregnancy that make certain kinds of sex difficult, for the most part there is no need to treat sex during pregnancy with anything other than common sense, and no reason to treat a healthy pregnant woman as if she were weak or ill.
The second, and equally misguided, assumption we make when we ask this question is to think about sex as if there is a right way and a wrong way to do it. In this case the idea would be that there's a right or safe way to have sex when you are pregnant. This is not true. There are infinite ways to have sex during pregnancy, depending on what kind of sex you want to have. The question exposes a rigid way of thinking about both pregnancy and sex. And it's the wrong place to start because great sex requires a flexibility of thought, and a willingness to try new things when the old ones aren’t working anymore.
As a general rule, a good sex position for pregnant sex is one where:
- both partners are physically comfortable
- the position allows for the kind of sex and physical contact you want to have
- both partners avoid putting pressure on the uterus, or a partner’s full weight on a pregnant belly.
Experts say that women should avoid lying on their back or right side for long periods of time after four months into the pregnancy.
Beyond this, figuring out pregnancy sex positions requires some creativity, a sense of humor, and often lots of pillows. It may also mean abandoning penetration if it isn’t working, and finding other ways to please each other and please yourself.
If you’re looking for some ideas to jump start all that creativity, you might want to develop your own sex positions by exploring the sex positions game. If that seems like too much work, the following sex positions are generally considered to be more comfortable as your (or your partners) body changes during pregnancy:
- The spooning sex position can be very comfortable as there is no pressure on your abdomen and you have lots of movement. Your partner can position themselves behind you at different angles to allow for penetration. Avoid lying on your right side in this position.
- The side by side sex position allows for more equal physical contact than spooning, but penetration can be a bit trickier. You can cross your legs over each others and this may help. As with spooning, this position can be very comfortable as no one is feeling the weight of the other partner’s body.
- The woman on top sex position offers the benefit of you being in control of the depth and angle of penetration. Later in the pregnancy you may find this position more tiring, and if balance is a concern you may prefer a lying down position, but others find this the ideal position.
- The rear entry sex position is said to be good for g-spot stimulation and can be a comfortable change as it’s a position you aren’t in that often, unless you’re doing yoga. This position can either be done on a bed, or modified as a version of the next sex position.
- The edge of the bed sex position offers many possibilities for greater comfort during pregnancy. You can lie on the bed (on your side, or briefly on your back) at the edge of the bed and your partner can be off the bed, either on their knees or standing up. Combined with the rear entry position, you can be off the bed on your knees (with a pillow underneath them) and rest your upper torso on the bed, with your belly off the bed.
Learn more about pregnancy and sex: