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Readers Respond: What Is Great Sex?

Responses: 33


From the article: What Is Great Sex?
Great sex can be hard to quantify. Is great sex measured by number of orgasms? Depth of intimacy? Is great sex the same as hot sex? Trying to define great sex can be both fun and instructive, as long as you don’t approach it as if you’re writing a playbook and you accept that everyone’s definition for great sex will be uniquely their own. Share Your Definition

Personal taste

For me great sex is with my now man. I agree with "being in tune" ...my man is the first uncircumcised in a line of lovers. It took me some time to realise that the devine sensation as he entered me and slowly started to thrust was due to the foreskin being in place giving a softer easier sensation. Great sex is when you can let yourself go, be at one with the sensations, forget about your worries, your surroundings...and just zone in on the pleasures and your partner. As I have got older I have begun to understand the spiritual side of sex, comfortable with joining with my man in a loving way and the more animalistic hard noisy mating that he enjoys most. When our kids were in the house we would abstain from anything that would make a noise and the sex was not good. The kids are all over 16 and we ended up telling them if they didn't want to hear us to bunk down elsewhere for the night or use headphones. It is our house and since he is FIFO, the kids give us privacy.
—Guest Desiree

Great Sex

Sex should be mutual and reciprocal. It should start with prolonged foreplay - lasting, may be more than an hour, followed by relaxed intercourse both partners abandoned and uninhibited in looking for each others orgasms. After climax they should be physically close and still be intimate.
—Guest Zena


Uninhibited sex is the world's best, in my opinion. I learned at a late age how exhilirating being in the arms of another man felt. My first real experience in bed with a man wasn't as satisfactory as I'd have liked it. The second time he and I were together was far more exciting. Kissing him was revelatory, and we each performed oral sex to climax, which sort of made up for the first go-round. Later on, I learned how to be a bottom, and I have never experienced elation, excitement, true love in any other fashion to that degree. Needless to say, finally learning that I'm gay and ultimately declaring it to myself was a moment I can never forget, nor is it a moment I will ever regret.

Love, love and love

Great sex is knowing I can enjoy making love with my husband because I love him and respect him and trust him. Great sex is also knowing that the feeling is mutual.
—Guest emilie

Being In Tune

I never knew mind blowing sex until I was with my current partner. I agree with the previous comments regarding compassion and tenderness for one another. I also feel like you have to be in tune with that person...know their body language to create pleasure for them and oneself. Having no pressures and being carefree. And, afterward, have a constructive discussion about what you really liked and what you would've liked a little more! In my personal opinion, I think that our amazing sex partially has to do with his uncircumcised penis. But, that's my personal preference. :)
—Guest Ktizzle

Great Sex Tip

The best sex for me is when my partner gets his or her needs up front. The penis isn't the only tool in the chest. Hands and fingers are some of the best tools to help bring your partner to orgasm. For a male find the p-spot just an inch or three toward the front of the of the male in his rectum. Massage the point when you find it and milk it. The man will come like wild. For a woman there is a point about half a finger length that has a different texture. That small area is the G-spot. That is the main erogenous zone for bringing her to have crashing orgasms. It takes some practice to find the G-spot. Use some water base lube and explore. It doesn't feel like sand paper, but there is a texture change that is the best trigger for her. Again bring your partner off if you can. It makes for much better sex when you can use your fingers to find those spots.
—Guest Chrissy

Professional Help

The best sex I ever had was when I was with a man who really knew what he was doing. It seemed to me that he got professional help in this category. I also would like to add that how he got me turned on helped the situation very much. I had a blast my hot sex night was indescribable. Sex is the best when you really get yourself into and it helps when the love for the person is very strong.
—Guest sexaddict

Simultaneous Orgasm...and Cuddles

Great sex is when you and your partner have passionate hot sex and climax at the same time followed by long cuddles.
—Guest lovesex

Orgasm Order

Sex is great when female's orgasm precedes male's ejaculation consistently.
—Guest krishnareddy

When you realize he lloves you...

My definition of great sex is knowing that the man i'm with loves me and we can both let go and enjoy each other, with no worries...

Sexual Rhythm

when your level of arousal parallels your partners , during each stage of progression to intercourse and/or orgasm ...

giving and receiving

Great sex, for me, happens when you completely give all of yourself to your partner, mind and body, and try to fulfill their desires of pleasure. You have to be kind of selfless. And then with trust and selflessness, you exchange great pleasure.
—Guest mindbody

Good Sex

To me great sex is not about orgasm. It is true that reaching climax is great in sex. But there are times that it just doesn't happen. However, the closeness that a person feels with their partner, the intimacy, and the enjoyment of the time spent together is what makes sex great.

great intimacy

When two people connect so deeply they float, do not come up for air hours on end, collapse from exhaustion of being one, intertwine as one speak words that are sexy yet inviting bodies being sweaty what more can one say?
—Guest shawna schneider

For the Guys...

Great sex for me is to be able to completely satisfy my girlfriend. Great sex is not just the intercourse... When you love someone or want someone really bad and the feeling is mutual, chances are that you will have great sex! My girlfriend and I enjoy having sex and the trick is to enjoy every bit of it instead of thinking of performance (for the guys)...
—Guest Bobby

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What Is Great Sex?

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